I think that to truly understand what a miracle baby Luke is, I have to start well before the day he was born. This amazing journey was such a blessing...
When Jeremy and I were approved to go to a new fertility clinic here in New York, I was excited but also apprehensive. The doctor we had in San Diego was amazing, above and beyond any other doctor I had dealt with. I knew that I would probably be impossible to find someone comparable, but I was ready to try. After dealing with the new clinic for a couple months, Jeremy was finally able to go to an appointment with me, one where we actually got to see the doctor and talk about our game plan. The man was rude, condescending and acted like I had zero experience when it came to my own body. He was pushy and wanted us to do procedures that we knew did not work for us and didn't want to try again. We moved from our meeting with him to the ultrasound and blood work portion of the visit and I felt sick. The nurse told us that she would call the following day and tell me what meds she was going to order (the doctor was so un-envolved, it was insane.)
Leaving the office, I got in the car and just started to cry. Jeremy was so upset that he said that he'd wanted to walk us right out of the meeting with the doctor. I expressed to Jeremy my deep concern with the lack of compassion and understanding from the doctor. How could we keep dealing with someone that was so disrespectful and treated my miscarriage, the loss of our child, like a clinical glitch especially knowing that I have such a high risk for miscarriage every time I get pregnant? Jeremy said we were not going back there, that we would find a different way. I will never forget how strong and determined Jeremy was in that moment when I was totally falling apart, it was such a comfort. I immediately call my OB/GYN to get a referral to new clinic.
The next day I got the call from the nurse while I was driving home from a friends house. I answered with a pit in my stomach knowing I was going to have to tell her not to order me meds and that we were not coming back... She said hello, and before I could say anything she told me she was not ordering me any med and that according to my blood work I was going to ovulate on my own. I was shocked. (For those that don't know, I have have polycystic ovarian syndrome (PCOS) and it means I don't ovulate on my own. My doctor in San Diego told me that I maybe, maybe ovulate on my own once a year!) I hung up the phone and received an amazing gift... I heard God speak to me as if he was sitting right there in the passenger seat. He said, "I am in charge of this, not the doctors or anyone else. I am. Don't worry." Two weeks later, before I even took a pregnancy test I knew. A peace and calm washed over me, I can't even find the right words to describe it, and it stayed with my my whole pregnancy and beyond.
*815 days is the count from the day we started trying for a second child to the day I got the positive pregnancy test with Luke.
The Friday before Luke was born I had a check-up. My doctor (whom I love) told me that he really didn't think that I was going to make it to my scheduled c-section the following Tuesday. I said I just needed Luke to hold on until my parents got there the next day. He told me to call when my contractions were 10 minutes apart. After my appointment, I went home, sat down and prayed Luke would stay put! Saturday morning arrived with strong contractions. Thankfully my parents were on their way, a long 8 hour drive. By the time they got to our house my contractions were closer together and I was relived that they were there to take care of Nathan when it was time.
Not being able to get much sleep, I moved to the couch at 3 a.m. Sunday morning to relax, watch Netflix and time my contractions. I was at 10 minutes apart, but I wanted to let everyone (including Jeremy and my doctor) have time to sleep. Eventually Jeremy joined me on the couch and at 5 a.m. we decided to make the call. The midwife told us to go to the hospital and get check in, she would call the doctor. I was so thankful that I went into labor when I did because I really wanted my doctor to be the one to deliver Luke. He was on call that weekend, but he wouldn't have been on Monday!
We made the short drive to the hospital and were all checked in by 6:30 a.m. All the prep work was done and we were just waiting for my doctor. Around 8 a.m. my parents came up with Nathan. I told them to wait at home but there was no way my mother was not going to be in the hospital. Half an hour later I was in the operating room and things happened fast after that.
Luke was born at 9:06 a.m. They told us he was 8 pounds 10 ounces and they laughed when I called him tiny- after Nathan, to me, Luke really was tiny! They laid him on my chest, finally, and I saw him for the fist time. It was unbelievable. He was perfect, he was ours and he was a complete miracle. Ten fingers and ten toes, and such a sweet little cry.
For me, compared to Nathan's birth and all the complications for me that followed, Luke's c-section seemed like a calm, out-of-body vacation. Obviously, a c-sectoin is major surgery and there is a lot of pain, but the recovery was easier than what I went through with Nathan's birth. The time we spent in the hospital afterwards was so relaxed, and we really got to take our time and bond with Luke before bringing him home. Welcoming Luke into our family shifted our view of what we wanted for our life. Originally we agreed on 3 children, but after having two and the pure joy we felt (still feel) we would love to have 4 or 5 ... we know ultimately it is in God's hands.
*Fun fact - Nathan was born 1/26 and Luke was born 2/26... TOTALLY unplanned!